


Smudged

by tragicallyidiotic



Category: Dear Evan Hansen - Pasek & Paul/Levenson
Genre: Alternate Universe - Everyone Lives/Nobody Dies, Connor Murphy does sfx makeup don't @ me you know i'm right, Face Painting, Fluff, Halloween, M/M, Sibling Bonding, They all get along!!, the boys are soft
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-10-31
Updated: 2019-10-31
Packaged: 2021-01-15 07:50:25
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 4,370
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/21249941
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/tragicallyidiotic/pseuds/tragicallyidiotic
Summary: Evan hasn't celebrated Halloween in years, he makes the mistake of letting Jared choose a costume for him, and Connor's good at face painting.





	Smudged

**Author's Note:**

  * For [AussieCanadian](https://archiveofourown.org/users/AussieCanadian/gifts).

> Good titles?? In THIS economy? I don't think so.

Evan Hansen stopped doing Halloween around the time his dad left.

And even before then, it wasn't something he.. enjoyed.

Because too many strangers demanded he say "trick or treat" before even thinking of giving him candy and he just. Couldn't. And he'd stand there with these strangers staring at him expectantly and a line of kids slowly forming behind him and then his dad would pat him on the back and look at him like he was the dumbest fucking kid in the world and his mom just stood there with this smile that was probably meant to be encouraging but even tiny Evan could recognize just how fake it seemed and overall it wasn't worth it for some candy that he only ever managed to eat like,, an eighth of.

The Halloween after his dad left, he'd stay home alone while his mom worked and clutched a bowl filled with candy in his grip. He'd spent the entire night staring at the door in fear of someone knocking on it. How much candy was he supposed to give them? What if he ran out? Would his mom be disappointed if he didn't get rid of all of it?

No one knocked that night. Turns out that no one really visits the neighborhood.

Still, he always made sure to have a bowl on him, just in case.

But not this year. Instead of sitting alone in a dark house with the TV on in the background for some form of comfort while he stares at the door like someone’s going to barge through with a gun and demand all the candy he has, he’s standing in front of a mirror, bouncing on the heels of his feet and wringing his hands together while he tries to talk himself into not throwing his fucking costume into oblivion and climbing into bed and taking a good sixteen hour long nap.

He couldn’t decide on a costume. This is really his fault.

Because Jared had specifically told him that, if he couldn’t decide on a costume by last Friday, he’d pick one up himself.

Evan thought he was lying. He’d hoped. He’d really fucking hoped it was just another one of his jokes.

But when Friday rolled around and had announced that he had no idea where he wanted to start, Jared grinned, announced that he had seen this coming, and pulled a costume out of his backpack.

It was one of those inflatable costumes; specifically, a t-rex costume.

It took up too much room, makes noise every time he tried to move, and it’s  _ warm and stuffy  _ and kind of makes him want to peel his skin off.

He shuts his eyes when he hears a knock on the door, willing whoever it is to go away. He doesn’t think he can do this.

Evan realizes, in dismay, that he has no choice when his mom knocks on the bathroom door.

“Evan, honey, Jared’s here to pick us up.”

He takes a deep breath.

Holds it.

Slowly lets it out.

Then opens the door and waddles out of his room before he can think better of it.

He’s going to get teased by Jared no matter what he does, might as well just get it down and over with instead of trying to delay the inevitable.

Also, he promised Connor he’d be there. He seemed so excited about his costume and, although he refused to tell him who he was dressing up as, he had relented and given him a hint.

Which was that his and Zoe’s costumes go together.

Thinking about that makes him smile kind of stupidly.

Sometimes he can’t believe how much Connor and Zoe’s relationship had improved-- hell, how much his relationship with his family in general has improved.

He’s so proud of them.

Another knock on the door, this one more persistent.

“Coming!” He shouts, his voice muffled from the costume.

Waddling over to the door as fast as his costume will allow, he stops to think about how he’s going to manage getting up the stairs when they get to the Murphy’s. What’s the car going to be like??

His mom finally opens the door for him. Her clothing is tattered and her skin looks bruised. She told him that she’s going to be helping out with the haunted house that the Murphy’s set up downstairs.

Evan’s kind of scared for her, because he’s heard a  _ lot  _ about people who punch when they’re scared and he’ll probably have a breakdown if he has to hear about someone punching his mom.

It’s when he realizes that Jared hasn’t said a word about his costume that he finally turns his attention to the door. The sight makes him laugh so hard that he thinks he nearly falls over because..

Jared’s standing in the doorway, his hands folded together across his stomach. He’s dressed in khaki shorts and a white shirt and…

He  _ has  _ to sit down. He doesn’t know what he was expecting, and he can’t fully comprehend just why it’s so funny to him, but..

“What’s so funny?” his mom asks, and she’s looking between the two of them with the amused confusion only parents seem to be capable of when trying to decipher their children’s humor.

Jared grins, finally stepping out of his position, and giving her an overexaggerated shrug, “Sorry, you know I just had to do it to em.”

His mom looks even more confused, but also seems to accept that that’s the only explanation she’s going to get.

Evan goes to stand up, and quickly realizes that maybe sitting down in this mess of a costume was a bad idea because he. Can’t Get Up.

Heidi laughs, holding out both of her hands for him to help him get back on his feet. He accepts gratefully, waddling on over to the door and squeezing through it.

One obstacle down, way too many more to go.

He needs help getting into the car, and it isn’t until they’re on the road that Jared finally makes a comment about his costume.

“I can’t believe you actually wore it.”

“I- uh, yeah.”

Jared rolls his eyes, “ _ Dude,  _ it was a joke gift. You didn’t have to.”

“Yeah but.. I just thought it’d be rude to not wear it and besides I didn’t even have a costume anyway so..”

“How are you going to get up the stairs?”

“I don’t.. I didn’t actually try it on until today so I haven’t had much time to think about it..” he mumbles, shrugging.

“Dude, just take it off when we get there. If you die on those stairs, I won’t be too far behind you when Murphy realizes I was the one who gave you the costume in the first place.”

Evan rolls his eyes, “Oh, come on. He wouldn’t..” he trails off when he sees the way Jared raises his eyebrows. “I mean, murder might be just a little extreme.”

“For you, maybe, but I don’t think he’s above it,” Jared shrugs.

Evan’s thankful to see that he doesn’t have to respond, because the moment the car’s parked, Jared’s rushing towards the door and posing.

There are people outside, helping to set things up.

Someone dressed as Jack Skellington is helping some of the Jazz Band with their makeup. He faintly remembers hearing that they were using the Haunted House as a way to.. Do something. He doesn’t really remember, because that’s quickly becoming an afterthought when it finally hits him and he realizes just who the Jack Skellington is.

It’s Connor.

Evan shuffles over to him.

“I didn’t know you did makeup,” he tells him.

Connor looks at him, snorting a little at the sight of the costume.

“Yeah, I facepaint sometimes,” he shrugs.

“But that’s not facepaint,” Evan points out, gesturing to the group of Jazz Band members with finished makeup. They’re covered in wounds that look too real for his liking, but he finally decides to turn away from them when he catches sight of someone whose face looks like it’s been torn, trying to ignore the queasiness settling over him.

“Oh, yeah, it’s just sfx,” he says, “Same difference.”

“ _ Just??  _ Connor, those look so.. Real! And the face paint is good too, I didn’t even recognize you!”

Connor frowns, “Who said I did my own makeup?”

He feels his cheeks flush with embarrassment, and he stammers to try and correct himself, “I mean, I assumed that you did because you were doing someone else’s makeup and that looks good and yours looks good too and that’s a stupid reason to try and connect them, It’s just.. I thought..”

He’s cut off by a laugh, and then there’s a hand on the general area where his shoulder is. “Evan.  _ Relax.  _ I was joking.”

"Oh. Right. Yeah. That's.. that was very funny."

"Doesn't sound like it was," he huffs, then pauses to take a good look at his costume, "You really wore that thing, huh?"

He laughs, albeit nervously, "Yeah. I. Couldn't decide on anything else and I mean. It'd be kind of rude to ignore something that someone else bought for me, so.."

"Is it comfortable?"

"What?"

"Is it comfortable?" He repeats, this time a little slower.

"Uh," he starts, "A little? It's really warm and uncomfortable and I'm having a hard time moving around."

Connor nods, biting the inside of his cheek while he stares at Evan. He kind of wants to shrink under his gaze, but he understands that Connor's thinking, so he does his best to wait patiently for him to speak.

"You should take it off," he says.

Evan feels his face heat up, and then he gives himself a little mental lecture for it because  _ that's gross Evan he means your costume get your mind out of the gutter. _

"I.." he starts, "But then I wouldn't have a costume and it's a costume party so that'd be weird."

"I can paint your face."

Evan thinks his brain might have stopped working for a moment there. "You can.. sorry, what?"

Connor grins, it looks kind of weird with his face paint, but it's beautiful nonetheless. "If you want, I can paint your face."

And Evan absolutely wants that, because from what he's seen so far, he's  _ amazing  _ at what he does and he'd probably kill if it meant getting to have the privilege of wearing his art around for the duration of the party.

But..

"I, uh, are you sure that you want to? It's okay. I've got this and I don't want to waste your time."

"Let me rephrase that," he starts, rolling his eyes. "Evan Hansen, if you don't let me paint your face, I will die."

"Wait, really?"

"Yeah," he says, leaning over him before pausing abruptly, sighing. "Also? I need an excuse to get you out of that. I'm not kissing plastic."

He laughs, "Wouldn't that smudge your face paint?"

"It's not like touch-ups aren’t a thing.”

“But.. it’s.. The white and black faint paint would mix, right? That’s.. The doesn’t really seem easy to fix.”

“ _ Evan.  _ I could wipe it off and reapply. It’s not a big deal, I swear.”

“Okay,” he says, mainly to himself. “Okay. Can you uh.. Can you help me? It’s just. Getting into this was enough of a struggle and if I have to try taking it off on my own, I  _ will  _ cry.”

“Yeah, sure,” he nods, “Think you can survive until we get inside the house?”

Evan frowns, nervously eyeing the entrance. It’s not ready yet, and he knows that people aren’t hiding around to scare people just yet, but just  _ knowing  _ there’s going to be a haunted house right there makes him want to take off running a mile away.

Maybe the costume limiting his movements is a good thing right now, because there’s no doubt in his mind that he would have at least managed to make it down the street because  _ Evan doesn’t do scary. _

“Do we.. have to go inside? I mean, what’s so wrong with staying out here all night? It’s not even that cold and I think we spend too much time inside anyway, maybe it’s good for the both of us to get some fresh air for once and-”

“Okay,” Connor interrupts, “Sure.”

Evan freezes. He hadn’t been expecting Connor to agree so easily.

“Buuuut..” Connor starts, and he should have known he wouldn’t have agreed that easily. He’s an idiot for ever thinking otherwise. “There’s usually like, a  _ line  _ of people out here. If you wanna stay outside, then we might have to talk with them.” Connor shuts his eyes, as if he’s reliving a distant memory. “I did it one year and I  _ hated it.  _ Handing out candy is the  _ worst.” _

Evan sighs, fully aware that he’s being overdramatic but he just. Doesn’t want to go through the haunted house. “I..” he starts, eyes flicking to the doorway, “Okay.”

“Great,” he grins, picking up his supplies. He goes to hand out his palette of face paints to Evan, but then seems to remember that Evan’s a t-rex right now who doesn’t need anything else to worry about because walking and not falling is enough of a chore as it is and there’s no doubt in his mind that he’d become so distracted with trying not to drop and ruin Connor’s paint that he’d trip and fall and then end up breaking it anyway.

Connor’s patient with him, and Evan’s more than grateful for that because he’s  _ trying  _ to walk fast but he’s just not equipped to try and speed walk while he’s also trying to figure out how to get the costume to stop doing that swooshing sound every time he takes a step or moves at all and also he keeps nearly tripping on the fabric itself and.

He knows now that this was supposed to be a joke, but Jared should know by now that Evan can never tell when or when not Jared specifically is joking because he’s a walking shit post.

Speaking of..

“Did you see where Jared went?”

Connor shakes his head, half-heartedly shrugging his shoulders, “I don’t know. Probably upstairs with Zoe and Alana. I’d bet that Alana’s trying to keep Jared preoccupied while Zoe finishes her eyeliner. She banned me from trying to do eye makeup on her after I poked her eye with the eyeliner and she started, like, crying black tears. Her eye went all black there for a second too. It was creepy.”

“That’s.. Is that even safe?”

“I hope so? Eyeliner’s supposed to be safe for being around the eyes so.. A little getting in shouldn’t blind her or anything. I think.”

“You  _ think??” _

“She told me it only stung for like.. Twenty seconds and she hasn’t said anything about her vision getting any shittier than it already is.”

Evan opens his mouth to speak, but instead lets out this sort of gasp shiver sound when he catches something standing in the corner, clinging to Connor.

Who looks extremely confused. He watches as his eyes wander around the room and finally land on the figure in the corner.

And then he  _ laughs. _

“Fuck you, Kleinman.”

“Wh..” he starts, squinting a little. He immediately feels himself relax when he realizes that, yeah, it’s just Jared.

Jared grins, giving them a bow.

“You think your parents would let me stand down here all night instead?”

“Don’t think they give a shit, but Zoe and Alana are the ones in charge of this whole thing so, ask them.”

Jared’s face falls, “Oh, come on. That’s bull.”

Connor holds his hands up in mock defense, “I don’t make the rules.”

“Listen, if you want to do it without at least asking them? That’s on you. But I’m not responsible for saving your ass when Alana kicks you into outer space for fucking with their plans.”

His face lights up again, “Actually, I did ask them.”

“And?”

“They said no. Like. Both at the same time. It was creepy,” he pauses. “Don’t you think your costumes are a little… weird?”

“No?” The warning tone in his voice makes Evan want to shrink back. He doesn’t enjoy standing there and listening like a creep, but his costume makes noise and the last thing he ever wants is to draw attention to himself.

“It’s just.. You don’t find that at least a little weird?” Jared pushes, and Evan can’t tell if Jared’s actively choosing to ignore the anger in Connor’s voice or if he’s just that oblivious.

“What? That we decided to dress up together?”

Jared finally seems to get the hint, shrugs, and backs away, mumbling something about going to raid them of their candy.

Connor finally turns back to him, “Okay. Let’s get you out of that right now. You look like you’re about to pass out.”

Huh. He hadn’t realized it until now, but Evan feels kind of lightheaded. So, he nods, and soon enough, he’s freed from the godforsaken costume.

His hair feels staticy. He tries not to show just how  _ ridiculous  _ he feels about it when Connor laughs, running a hand through it.

“You’re all sweaty,” he points out.

“Yeah. The costume was warm.”

“Have any face paint requests?”

“Uh…” he looks down at his feet, then back up at Connor to meet with kind eyes, “No?”

And his slight belief that his answer just might  _ disappoint  _ him is thrown into the sea when he sees the way Connor grins.

“You’ll let me paint your face?”

“Yes?”

Connor looks a little hesitant, “Anything?”

“Yea-- uh. No.” he responds, scrambling to clarify himself when he sees the way Connor’s face falls. “No! I just- yeah, you can do.. Mostly anything. I don’t care? Well. I mean. I do care, because I really want you to paint my face and I know that sounds silly but I trust you it’s just. Pleasedon’tpaintanythinggross because my mom’s here and Jared would never let me live it down and I really don’t think I can handle getting that look of disappointment from your dad. So.”

There’s a pause. And then Connor says, very slowly, “You think I’m going to draw a dick on your face?”

“No! I mean. Yeah? Maybe? A little bit?”

He rolls his eyes, “I’m not Jared.”

“I hope not,” Evan responds, which earns him a playful shove in return.

“Come on. I still need to put my contacts in.”

And then he’s being dragged up the stairs. He’s never been more thankful for his ability to walk without tripping… most of the time.

They run into Alana as soon as they get upstairs. She’s got a witch costume on, carrying a broom defensively at her side.

He wouldn’t be surprised to hear if she’d wacked Jared with it a few times.

She grins as soon as she spots them.

“Evan, hi!” she greets, her voice carrying on a fake cheerful tone which.. He doesn’t like. He’s thankful that Alana’s the type of person to just say whatever’s on her mind. “Where’s your costume? Jared was telling me all about it.”

“It was making him walk around like a fucking toddler that just learned how to walk,” Connor tells her, “So I’m painting his face.”

“Oh!” she claps her hands together, “That’s great! When you’re done, can you two come and find me? I want to take group pictures.”

“Absolutely,” Connor responds, and then he’s dragging Evan, who’s waving to Alana, into his room.

Connor immediately sits Evan down in the chair by his desk, laying out his paints and then stepping back from them, his index finger tapping against his lips while his eyes flick from the paint, then to Evan, and back to the paints again.

That process continues until it, well, doesn’t. It seems like something’s finally clicked in Connor’s brain, because it’s not long before he’s dipping a brush into the purple and brushing against Evan’s forehead, nose, and his cheeks.

Although he’s curious, and also kind of sort of very worried about the colors, he doesn’t dare move or say a word about it because Connor just looks so  _ focused _ . His eyes are squinted and his tongue is kind of sticking out of his mouth and he's making light and careful brush strokes. It's more relaxing than he ever would have guessed.

Eventually, he has to close his eyes because he needs a moment to just. Relax. The brush kind of tickles, but it feels nice. And every time Connor's hand brushes against his cheek, he feels all warm and tingly.

It ends too soon.

He may or may not have dozed off for a moment there.

Or rather, it felt more like he was half-asleep. Still there. Kind of.

Connor taps on his shoulder, and when he opens his eyes, he's met with a smile so bright and giddy and Evan can't help but think that he'd genuinely  _ kill  _ for that smile because it's just  _ so good. _

"Done?"

He gets an eager nod, and then Connor's pulling up his phone and holding it in front of Evan's face so he can see for himself.

Evan's breath catches in his throat.

It's..

"Woah," is all he can manage.

Connor's looking at him expectantly, with his eyes clasped together while he waits for what Evan has to say about it.

Embarrassingly, instead of managing to simply  _ tell him  _ about how much he loves it, he finds that his voice has decided it doesn't want to exist anymore and finds tears swelling in his eyes in its place.

And that's probably the exact  _ opposite  _ of what Connor wanted from him, because he's scrambling for makeup wipes and pulling one out of the packet and  _ he really has to speak up now because he doesn't hate it at all. _

"Shit. Sorry. I should have checked in with you to see if it was okay, huh? It was dumb. That's okay. I can clean it up," Connor rambles, and Evan has to grab onto his arm before the wipe can even  _ think  _ of coming near his face.

Through his blurred vision, he notices that Connor's eyes are teary, too.

" _ I love it,"  _ He tells him, making sure to pour all the emotion into his words as he can manage because he truly does love it. He loves it so much and he's being a crybaby over it.

How could it not when Connor's painted the night sky onto his face?

"You don't have to lie. It's okay."

"Connor," he sighs, "I'm not.. why would I lie about that?"

"Because you don't want to hurt my feelings?" Connor's staring at the ground now. Evan imagines that, if they were outside, he'd likely be kicking the dirt.

Evan decides to do the only thing he can think of and pulls Connor in for a kiss, trying to ignore the fact that he consumes some face paint in the process.

"I'm not lying to you, I promise. I love it," another peck on his lips, "And I love  _ you." _

"You're sure?"

"Absolutely," he nods, reaching into his pocket for his phone. "Let's take a bunch of pictures together before we go find Alana."

Connor goes to say something about fixing up the now gray area around his lips, but Evan's already started snapping a few photos.

They take more than what's probably necessary.

Connor fixes his makeup eventually, then grabs a contact case with contacts that are  _ way too big are those even designed for humans? _

"Scleras," Connor tells him, and when he turns around, his eyes are black.

It's creepy.

They take one last photo before they venture out into the party to go find everyone else.

Evan makes sure to set it as his new profile picture on Instagram.

* * *

As soon as they step outside of the door, they catch sight of Jared, who's just.. standing awkwardly in the middle of the room in that pose and..

He shouldn't be laughing but it's so ridiculous that it'd be a crime  _ not  _ to.

And then, Alana's got her arms wrapped around both of their shoulders, dragging the two of them towards Jared, who, he finally realizes, is standing next to…

"Is that Zoe?" He asks. Stupidly.

Connor nods, and Evan takes a second to stare at her because..

She doesn't look recognizable. He's not sure he would've been able to identify just who she was if he hadn't known that her costume was related to Connor's in some way.

Zoe's got a red, yarn wig on, her skin blue and what be can only guess has to be an  _ exact replica  _ of Sally's dress.

But he thinks what he's most impressed by is how  _ realistic  _ the stitches that litter her body are.

He's pulled from his thoughts when Alana comes back (he hasn't even noticed her  _ leave _ in the first place) with Cynthia, Larry, and his mom.

Cynthia's in yoga wear, which he doesn't think is any different from her usual, but what  _ is  _ different is that it's torn. She's got a large gash across her chest and her skin looks rotted.

It takes a little longer for it to click, for him to figure out just why Larry's there, because, from what he can tell, he's got no costume on. Just a suit. Maybe he's going to work.

But then he finally sees the blood dripping down from a small wound right in the middle of his forehead and he jumps so violently that he swears he jumped out of his skin there, for a moment.

Connor cracks up laughing, pulling him in close for a hug.

"Your dad let you do his makeup?" Evan asks.

"Yeah, Cynthia wanted me to do hers and when Larry saw, I guess he decided to act like he cares for once and join in."

"I think it's an improvement," he tells him, "He's trying."

"I guess."

"Trick or treaters should be arriving soon!" Alana announces, "Let's hurry up with the pictures before we have to split up."

They all lean in to take a crowded selfie.

And then like, thirty other different pictures.

But Evan thinks the ones he took with Connor are his favorites.


End file.
